mind was full tonight, observation was lost, though these types of sessions have an odd feeling of necessity and importance
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January 8, 2010 • 6:45 AM 0
koan slipped into the meaningless repetition realm this morning and mind was quite sloppy yet easily directed, uber early morning sitting has quite a peculiar flavor
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January 7, 2010 • 6:41 PM 0
just sat and observed tonight, tried to be at ease and let I and mind hold each other like teddy bears
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January 7, 2010 • 11:19 AM 0
counted breath, guts, heart, throat, stomach all had stuff to say this morning
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January 6, 2010 • 6:36 PM 0
mind wanted to think and plan tonight, nowhere nowhere
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January 5, 2010 • 7:41 PM 0
some profound koan insights were like a paper thin sheet of ice tonight, each time i tried to observe one my attempt only succeeded in melting it, none the less i was curious to notice them at all since i felt at the beginning of the session that my exploration of the koan was entering a stale phase, then i began to realize that “mind comes forth” is kind of a given and can be applied to any phenomena that is registered by the 5 senses plus thought and memory, so as soon as a phenomena is noticed immediately labeling and exploring it as “nowhere” can bring about some interesting feelings about the relation between space/time and self
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January 4, 2010 • 7:06 PM 0
double session tonight, first half could only observe a mind like a windshield covered in peanut butter, dull and would only smear with no clarity, it actually cleared up on its own towards the end and seemed like a good opportunity to focus during a second sitting, got some practice with chakras and more koan
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January 3, 2010 • 10:26 PM 0
koan was like mantra tonight, plus very focused mind considering how beat-up body was from being in the cold all day and how late and tired i am
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January 2, 2010 • 9:09 PM 0
counted breath, not many thoughts tonight, very simple
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January 1, 2010 • 10:56 AM 0
koan was very stimulating this morning, it made mind work and move and produce but all around a central focus, started questioning the relation between “comes forth” and “nowhere”, began to realize that the location of mind resides in where it arises/comes-forth and it often arises from what we see, which is why i keep thinking my mind is behind my eyes in my brain but started to realize it has also been wherever my strongest sense is at any moment, mind is in my stomach when im stuffed, it is in my fingers when i am touching yana, it is in my feet when i am walking in the cold snow, i then began to see that it is also what is being sensed, mind is yana’s skin and so “yana” loses its meaning, mind is the cold and so “the” loses its meaning,
following this my attention drifted and i fealt a familiar smothering by what ive only ever been able to describe as a gigantically magnified whif of dust, ive featl it many times in my life and it always brings anxiety, this time i was able to sit with it and observe it, tried applying different ideas to it, bubble mind, chi, nothing stuck,
afterwards my mind became dull and then refocused on a bag in front of me, realized the bag was my mind arising and labeled it “nowhere”, then realized that for something to be nowhere all points of reference must cease and the only continually referenced point for the mind is the self
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January 1, 2010 • 12:43 AM 0
started with a discomfort of some kind ended with koan goodness, the “nowhere” part is very rich, its fading now but it felt very object-like, less like a non place and more like a tangible thing that was in or around all places, began playing with placing mind there
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December 31, 2009 • 6:38 PM 0
mind was thick with mud tonight, was kicked in my emotional nuts right before sitting, had a real juicy time of it though, started working on my koan for the new year; “out of nowhere, the mind comes forth” from the diamond sutra, found “mind” to be interchangeable with “I”, made me curious what some other translations of this line are
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December 30, 2009 • 9:44 AM 0
started with a mind like a blank slate at this mornings sitting then it gradually filled up as i woke up, today it seemed as though the thoughts were clinging to me like a cozy blanket, wasnt attached so much as unwilling to fully let them go
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December 29, 2009 • 5:32 PM 0
sitting went by quickly tonight, mind was busy, the dance for focus was nice
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April 14, 2008 • 7:54 PM 0
Dragons, lots of dragons!
I have also decided that for strategic purposes I should read Flatland again. Its like a 19th century Dr Seuss novel by Edwin Abbott Abbott [such a good name]. Related to that, ‘Horton Hears a Who’ might be the new movie while I work of the week.
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April 7, 2008 • 7:23 PM 0
Yana’s show was nice, real nice. Check it out on yanabeing
Research is going well all around, also inching closer to completing some of the paper works all over the floor. Found a new grid system for the wall that should help get ideas out more efficiently and am acknowledging Joseph Campbell audio books to be life savers.
Will be getting the site ready for a plethora of purposes in the next month or so with a potential show in the city in late spring?
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March 31, 2008 • 7:49 PM 0
Been hacking at a bundle of things. The paintings are taking some interesting routes but no timeline for finishing them has emerged.
Yana’s solo show opens this week, should be able to find info on it at yanabeing.com. Its gonna be killer, cuz she’s crazy.
Also am contemplating the removal of the notes to self sound files, they are bugging me, such monotone is not meant for this world.
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February 24, 2008 • 3:34 AM 0
The sound clips are up now, begin the mojo. There will be a lot of these since I have discovered the joy of this new cellphone option, I have recorded a couple hundred since December.
They are pretty monotone since they really are just notes to myself but I feel compelled to share them…maybe something I have to do is something you should do too?
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February 22, 2008 • 7:54 AM 0
Drips from the Ocean. Must finish, I will begin immediately to interogate them for secrets.
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February 22, 2008 • 5:37 AM 0
Quite a lot coming up. Yana has a show opening in a week with a major project, I’ll try to put a card up soon. She actually creates the projects I usually just settle on doing drawings of, check out her website link, its killer.
Work on the Jill/Bill book is moving forward steadily. Will probably be posting some architecturally motivated paper drawings any day now. The small paintings I’ve been up to will usher in the radical return of the tesseract (look it up). Finally the as yet untitled yellow pictures should be ready for a glimpse whenever.
Oh and there will be a gathering at PA’s (Personal Affairs clothing) downtown store this Friday evening (?) to honor Yana’s excellent clothing designs on display.
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February 22, 2008 • 5:33 AM 0
January 19, 2008 • 9:34 PM 0
found a new use for the bathtub today. should have some paintings or drawings to show after this weekend.
Watched Children of Men today, pretty amazing movie for such a simple concept, quite sentimental too considering how violent it was. watching Batman Begins again, batman as a ninja is genius.
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January 11, 2008 • 1:36 AM 0
I finished a design today for a “logo” for yana’s and my website KM. Just a funny image we imagined one night while discussing an idea for a comic book. Will be posting the color version soon.
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January 5, 2008 • 11:43 PM 0
A bunch of small projects underway, pulling out some older stories I’ve had on the shelf that have been lighting up my thoughts again. I should have some sketches for those soon along with more of what’s below.
Watching “The Invasion” right now, its a typical sci fi movie but seems well done.
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December 16, 2007 • 2:57 AM 0
another test
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dfgjhfgjkhdfgkjdhfgkjhsdfg
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December 9, 2007 • 8:39 PM 0
Hello world!
Welcome to WordPress.com. This is your first post. Edit or delete it and start blogging!
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